Ibn al-Qayyim (may Allaah have mercy on him) said:
It may be that what he meant is that your criticizing your brother for his sin is an even greater sin than his, because it means that you feel pride in your obedience and you are praising yourself for that, and claiming to be free from sin, whereas your brother has fallen into sin. But it may be that his feeling humble because of his sin and what has happened to him, such as his feeling humble and submissive, thinking less of himself, ridding himself of pious pretensions, arrogance and self-admiration, standing before Allaah with his head bowed, his gaze lowered and his heart broken – it may be that all of that is better for him than your feeling proud of your obedience, thinking that you are doing much good, believing that by doing so you are important, and reminding Allaah and mankind of that.
How close this sinner is to the mercy of Allaah, and how close this conceited one is to the wrath of Allaah! A sin that leads to humility is more beloved to Him than an act of obedience which fills a person with conceit. If you sleep all night then wake up feeling regret (for not having prayed qiyaam al-layl), that may be better for you than if you were to pray all night and wake up in the morning filled with self-admiration. For the deeds of the one who admires himself are not accepted. Perhaps your laughing whilst admitting to shortcomings is better than your weeping with piety but being filled with conceit. The groaning of the sinners is more beloved to Allaah than the tasbeeh of the conceited. It may be that by means of this sin, Allaah has caused him to drink the medicine that will cure a fatal disease which you also have, but you do not realize it. Allaah has reason for what He does to both those who are obedient and those who sin, which are known to no-one except Him, and which no one recognizes except those who have insight, and then only within the limits of human understanding; beyond that there are reasons which are not even known to the honourable scribes (i.e., the recording angels). The Prophet said: “If the slave woman of any one of you commits adultery, let him carry out the punishment on her and not criticize.” And Yoosuf (peace be upon him) said: “No reproach on you this day” [Yoosuf 12:92 – interpretation of the meaning]. For the scale is in the hand of Allaah, and the ruling is His. The point is to carry out the punishment (prescribed by Allaah) and not to shame and criticize. No one feels safe from what has been decreed for them and from the power of His decree except those who are ignorant of Allaah. Allaah said to the one who had more knowledge of Him than anyone else and was closer to Him: “And had We not made you stand firm, you would nearly have inclined to them a little”[al-Israa’ 17:74 – interpretation of the meaning]. And Yoosuf said: “Unless You turn away their plot from me, I will feel inclined towards them and be one (of those who commit sin and deserve blame or those who do deeds) of the ignorant”[Yoosuf 12:33 – interpretation of the meaning]. One of the ways in which the Messenger of Allaah used to swear was “No, by the One who turns hearts.” And he said, “There is no heart which is not between two of the fingers of the Most Merciful. If He wills He guides it aright and if He wills He sends it astray.” Then he said, “O Allaah, the one Who turns hearts over, make our hearts steadfast in adhering to Your religion. O Allaah, musrif al-Quloob, sirf our hearts to obey You.”
It may be that what he meant is that your criticizing your brother for his sin is an even greater sin than his, because it means that you feel pride in your obedience and you are praising yourself for that, and claiming to be free from sin, whereas your brother has fallen into sin. But it may be that his feeling humble because of his sin and what has happened to him, such as his feeling humble and submissive, thinking less of himself, ridding himself of pious pretensions, arrogance and self-admiration, standing before Allaah with his head bowed, his gaze lowered and his heart broken – it may be that all of that is better for him than your feeling proud of your obedience, thinking that you are doing much good, believing that by doing so you are important, and reminding Allaah and mankind of that.
How close this sinner is to the mercy of Allaah, and how close this conceited one is to the wrath of Allaah! A sin that leads to humility is more beloved to Him than an act of obedience which fills a person with conceit. If you sleep all night then wake up feeling regret (for not having prayed qiyaam al-layl), that may be better for you than if you were to pray all night and wake up in the morning filled with self-admiration. For the deeds of the one who admires himself are not accepted. Perhaps your laughing whilst admitting to shortcomings is better than your weeping with piety but being filled with conceit. The groaning of the sinners is more beloved to Allaah than the tasbeeh of the conceited. It may be that by means of this sin, Allaah has caused him to drink the medicine that will cure a fatal disease which you also have, but you do not realize it. Allaah has reason for what He does to both those who are obedient and those who sin, which are known to no-one except Him, and which no one recognizes except those who have insight, and then only within the limits of human understanding; beyond that there are reasons which are not even known to the honourable scribes (i.e., the recording angels). The Prophet said: “If the slave woman of any one of you commits adultery, let him carry out the punishment on her and not criticize.” And Yoosuf (peace be upon him) said: “No reproach on you this day” [Yoosuf 12:92 – interpretation of the meaning]. For the scale is in the hand of Allaah, and the ruling is His. The point is to carry out the punishment (prescribed by Allaah) and not to shame and criticize. No one feels safe from what has been decreed for them and from the power of His decree except those who are ignorant of Allaah. Allaah said to the one who had more knowledge of Him than anyone else and was closer to Him: “And had We not made you stand firm, you would nearly have inclined to them a little”[al-Israa’ 17:74 – interpretation of the meaning]. And Yoosuf said: “Unless You turn away their plot from me, I will feel inclined towards them and be one (of those who commit sin and deserve blame or those who do deeds) of the ignorant”[Yoosuf 12:33 – interpretation of the meaning]. One of the ways in which the Messenger of Allaah used to swear was “No, by the One who turns hearts.” And he said, “There is no heart which is not between two of the fingers of the Most Merciful. If He wills He guides it aright and if He wills He sends it astray.” Then he said, “O Allaah, the one Who turns hearts over, make our hearts steadfast in adhering to Your religion. O Allaah, musrif al-Quloob, sirf our hearts to obey You.”
Madaarij al-Saalikeen, 1/177, 178)
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